The Gospel and Parenting - Chapter 1 "What Are We For?"

Welcome to the Young Families Blog. Recently, I have been reading a great parenting book The Gospel and Parenting from the series The Gospel for Life.  This book is a short book, but very powerful.  Over the next five posts, I will discuss various concepts from the book.  Each post will cover a chapter of the book. Chapter 1 "What Are We For?" notes are below.

MAIN IDEA - Christian parenting has to be rooted in the Gospel of Jesus Christ because of the increasing secularization of culture. In order for this to happen the following has to happen:

  1. Christian parents have to affirm the primacy of Scripture. Christian parents cannot parent according to their parents parenting or to what culture says is okay. The Bible has a lot to say about parenting. The Christian parent's main job is to understand the Bible well enough to not only apply it to their lives, but also to the lives of others, particularly their children.
  2. Christian parents have to affirm to the priority of their marriage in the home. The Christian parent's home cannot become child-centered. The husband and wife have to prioritize their marriage. Here are a few examples.
    1. Carve out time daily to talk and debrief from the day.
    2. Go on a date at least once a month.
    3. Try to do a get away for a night or two alone.
  3. Christian parents have to uphold their responsibility to lead. The responsibility to lead comes from a proper understanding of the Word of God.
  4. Christian parents have to understand the importance of the heart. Proverbs 4:23 "Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life." Do not be so concerned with external behavior that you ignore the heart. God is more concerned with the heart of a child. Part of reaching the heart of a child is helping them understand their own motives. Reaching the heart of the child is described as one of the most difficult parts of parenting.
  5. Christian parents have to understand the necessity of discipline.
    1. Christian parents have to understand that we discipline because we are in authority.
    2. Christian parents have to understand that we discipline because the Bible says that children are to obey. (Ephesians 6:1-3, Colossians 3:20, Proverbs 6:20)
      • “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, because this is right. Honor your father and mother, which is the first commandment with a promise, so that it may go well with you and that you may have a long life in the land.” (Ephesians 6:1–3, CSB)
      • “Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.” (Colossians 3:20, CSB)
      • “My son, keep your father’s command, and don’t reject your mother’s teaching.” (Proverbs 6:20, CSB)
    3. Christian parents have to understand that we discipline because children do not obey on their own. Children inherited the sin nature of Adam and are sinners by nature and by choice.
    4. Christian parents have to understand that we discipline to give our child their own identity. Hebrews 12:7-8
      • “Endure suffering as discipline: God is dealing with you as sons. For what son is there that a father does not discipline? But if you are without discipline—which all receive—then you are illegitimate children and not sons.” (Hebrews 12:7–8, CSB)
    5. Christian parents have to understand that we discipline because it yields right behavior. Hebrews 12:11
      • “No discipline seems enjoyable at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.” (Hebrews 12:11, CSB
    6. Christian parents have to understand that all discipline must be done with great humility. Gentleness has to be at the heart of every act of discipline.
  6. Christian parents have to understand the reality of the battle. Satan hates marriage and he hates family. Therefore, Christian parents have to put on the full armor God...
  • “Finally, be strengthened by the Lord and by his vast strength. Put on the full armor of God so that you can stand against the schemes of the devil. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers of this darkness, against evil, spiritual forces in the heavens.” (Ephesians 6:10–12, CSB)